Movie Title: Tango & Cash
Genre: Action, Comedy, Crime, Thriller
Director: Andrey Konchalovskiy (as Andrei Konchalovsky), Albert Magnoli (uncredited)
Starring: Sylvester Stallone, Kurt Russell, Teri Hatcher, Jack Palance, Brion James, James Hong, Marc Alaimo, Philip Tan, Michael J. Pollard, Robert Z'Dar, Lewis Arquette, Edward Bunker, Michael Jeter, Clint Howard, Geoffrey Lewis
Review: Framed for murder by a criminal kingpin, mismatched LAPD cops Ray Tango (Sylvester Stallone) and Gabriel Cash (Kurt Russell) must put their differences aside to escape prison and get even using brawl, bullets, and buffoonery.
Tango & Cash is cheesy '80s action that was born from the success of Lethal Weapon. The only problem is Tango & Cash tries too hard to be like so many other action films that came before that it comes off as lazy, tired, and uninspired. The film was plagued by many production problems (Lead actor dropped out, fired DP, director replaced, severe re-edits, went 20 million over budget, etc.) and it's very apparent.
The story is simple enough, but it's a very loose thread to hang a mismatched buddy cop movie on. The villain played by Jack Palance seems like he's from an entirely different movie and doesn't seem like a threat whatsoever. It just seems odd that the hardy and virile Sylvester Stallone and Kurt Russell have met their match with the hammy and cartoonishly villainous character that the elderly Jack Palance plays. Now, listen. I am NOT elderly shaming here. Jack Palance is great and he did all of those push-ups at the Oscars that one time, but in the context of this movie he doesn't stand a chance against our two leads. I'm just saying. It's a little silly.
Now, the action is typical for a movie of the time. But, the assault on the villains compound is rather memorable thanks to a unique motor vehicle driven by our heroes. The humor is a bit too on the nose and forced by our stars. You know what? This film should have been titled Over the Top instead of that other Stallone gem Over the Top. Everything about Tango & Cash is greedily over the top and kind of leaves you feeling empty without the joy that should come from getting entertained by a surefire '80s action-packed romp with the likes of Sylvester Stallone and Kurt Russell. It does have it's moments (Russell in drag, Teri Hatcher's '80s dance routine, Russell's undeniably amazing mane of hair). Tango & Cash is not terrible, but it could have been a lot more fun.
Fun Fact: When Tango and Cash escape from the prison, Cash turns to Tango and asks if he stopped "for coffee and a Danish." Tango says, "I hate Danish," an in-joke referring to Sylvester Stallone's recent divorce from Danish actress Brigitte Nielsen.